Laugh it up

So let us say that I start coming up with random sentences and putting them together, regardless of what they're sense. I like cheesecake, but not the traditional one, I think that there's one made of "dulce de leche" that you can only get in Santo Domingo, that's DAMN good. So with the idea in my head I just start writing to work out my hand muscles, just because I feel like it. Note to self: Make sure to clean room and organize this months hate mail schedule. All and all, I don't think anyone will mind me doing this, since it's been 7 months since I started this and no one feels like writing one single comment. I wonder what will happen next month. But, if I think about it, I don't write for people to come and read, obviously, if that was my intention in the first place I would've posted more interesting things and stop bitching about everything that comes to mind. I don't like Goldfrapp so much, but their work is good. Every now and then I start to review everything I have posted so far and it's pretty personal stuff; and all of the music I listen to, which is diverse, and my sense of humor, and how I feel about the world, all of those things are pretty much like this brick wall that I made. Awkward. Not to mention the fact that I sometimes think that everyone wants to avoid me. If life gives you lemons, make bad lemonade give it to life and say: "I don't make lemonade, give me what I want". The blog is pretty much how I deal with those things. Now, where was I? I don't want to be an outsider, but that's just the way I've been living.

I believe that anyone who wants to do something has the power to do so. I have people that are close to me who want to believe otherwise, like in high school I wanted to study in Japan and I ask my then closest friend, and all she said was that no one can learn Japanese in one year. Sadly, I was naive enough to believe her. That person later turned out to be a self centered, back stabbing jackass, who's recently getting married. So now I sit in front of my computer and start letting that one out of my head, releasing that demon from my past. Does it sound like I'm exaggerating? If that's so, then how come I kept thinking about that for so long. It's not the comment that hurts, it's who said it. You expect a friend to stick by your side and as you stand up for them, for them to stand up for you. But, regardless, of the many times I've been put down, and made feel like I'm not worth living, I get up, and clean the blood off my mouth; and just laugh it up. One of the things I'm grateful about my personality is that I'm hard-headed; I don't generalize. Someone did something bad to me, but there's always hope in the next person, even though there's mistrust, I don't feel like judging anyone.

No one has that power.

I'm still alive

Yeah. More than 3 months since I last posted. Jesus! Can you believe that? Have I been busy? Or maybe just afraid to let those feelings out? Hmm... Let's leave catharsis for another post. That done, let's talk about some trivial things like the fact that my discussion group "muchtosayaboutnothing" (feel free to visit) had it's first engagement since it was made. That makes me so happy. And it was provoked by the least expected comment.

The last couple of months have been fun. But now I want to take pics and post them. I'll be sure to do some stuff more often than not. Even though no one visits (like in real life) I don't care.

That's it for now, wait for my other posts coming soon.

And into the gates he walks

As he turned away from the crowd, a cold chill ran through his spine. The setting sun over the skyline reminded him of where he wanted to be, at the same time, a look down the paved floor reminded him of where he was.

The last time he had fun was long ago. Not the fun people want you to have, the kind of pleasure that comes with a string attached. One end, pleasure; the other, remorse. This is not what he wanted, this is not what he looked for. As further away he was, the chill seemed to dim. He followed her into the crowd, into the noise, the chaos; and he admitted enjoying it for a while, then, that hung over feeling. That chill, that guilt, that feeling of waste. She, the temptress, the one he thought was pure; the one that took away what he gave. Nevertheless, an easy treat.

He didn't care for her now. She could stay in her heaven, while he ran away from his hell.

When the chaos engulfed the city, the crowd turned into a monster. The tentacles didn't come close, even at his slow pace. Cool headed, he kept walking where he felt like he needed to. Turning where he felt like, jumping the fences he saw on his way. If he fell, he would get up. He didn't care, better things were ahead. As the monster lurked, wanting to catch what it let go, it transformed into the temptress. She sang, moaned and cried for him. He didn't answer, he didn't care. No matter how fast the monster, the temptress, the crowd, chased; he would go faster, but it seemed that as fast as he went, he was very calm, cool and walking.

He knew that this is about him, it's always been.

<<<

Hope anyone that reads this likes it, this came from just sitting in front of the computer at a regular workday, just letting whatever I thought of out. I admit, I don't post the most interesting things. In fact, this is pretty much my records so I don't expect anyone to like it. Except for this though. I actually would like to get some input on this.

I noticed that other blogs are giving their share of information to others. I didn't intentionally think about it, I just felt like tonight I should post something that was public friendly; and by all means if it's not then let me know.

But posting this first part was cathartic, which is one of the advantages of having a blog: Letting those bits of information out.
>>>

The Birthday that never was

So, may the 19th passed... And what a glorious day. I went to the dentist, and took care of some other medical visits afterwards. I was scheduled to meet with friends and co-workers at some place but nobody showed up. Like always something happenned to everyone, at a global level. What's funny is that few called or left text messages.

I think I'm doing something wrong socially. That's the only explanation. I showed up late, because I was elsewhere hanging out with other people too, so that's why I'm not feeling resentful about what didn't happen.

But hell who cares! I returned home and hung out with my brother. I ordered sushi and we took pics.

I have to admit the year of the van has been one full of lessons. I don't like aging, in fact ever since I realized that I didn't get second chances, when I was 8 years old, every birthday seems to be a reminder that my time is limited. But it's not like I can help it. I can't turn back time, neither can I literally relive those years. Mind my philosophical interlude, but: if I was to wake up tomorrow, and begin from 5 years of age, I'd have a lot of information in my head. Then my whole childhood would lose it's meaning. It would give me an important advantage in life, but then again, somethings are not suppossed to be tampered with, like the delicate balance of life, whatever the hell that is.

So there goes my dream of redoing everything better. It's a stupid dream. I can't think of redoing stuff, I have to focus on doing stuff the right way. I will admit something, in peril of people taking advantage of this, when someone wants to redo their life, it's because they're not happy of how they have lived it. And I'm not happy. I've lost a lot of chances, but it doesn't mean I don't get to choose how I live the rest of my life. The only way to make things better, is to share what I know with others, not an easy task, but a possible one.

Hey everything that is worth while is difficult. That's why they refer to it as: worth while.

At the end, the fact that no one joined me in my get together doesn't bother me. The last year was a good one, and left me with a good amount of experience for not making the same mistakes again, and preventing future mishaps from coming to. And I'm happy with that.

Prueba y Error

Este es un metodo cientifico, en el cual se verifica la eficacia de una teoria. Determinando donde falla, y donde brilla. Tambien la gente lo usa como principio intrinseco de desarrollo social. O sea que, si fulano mete la pata una vez, siendo fulano una persona con este tipo de principios, no vuelve a meter la pata de nuevo.

Poco a poco, si uno sigue este tipo de principio, se da cuenta que siempre habrá una segunda vez para cometer el mismo error. Y que nadie pasa su vida en una existencia perfecta; quien dice eso es un puro baboso y que se deje de cosas que nadie se lo esta creyendo. Freco.

Virginal Delights

Since my last post turned out to be more socio-political than planned I come with a white flag and something that I enjoy every now and then:

It is of popular knowledge that ignorance is bliss. When you don't know what you're missing, you don't miss it at all. The things that are outside of our field of knowledge, the most part, don't affect us. A person we know can win a million dollars at this moment just because he said hi to his mother on tv and because we don't know about it nor have heard of it we don't care.

Well it's not like that with sex. We might be virgins but since the media is so into letting us know about sex, it's very difficult to avoid the information bombarded at us. That, and the whole puberty thing.

I happen to enjoy the ignorance of being a virgin, and frankly I'm afraid of the consequences that having sex might have now that I know what I have. The teenage giggling, everytime I hear something that is sex related, the word association with anything that has to do with the sex act. Those things make me laugh. And it's not the awkward shy giggle, oh no, that, my friends, has evolved into a mockery laughter. I'm not saying that I don't want to engage in those acts, but at this moment I know that I'll miss this stage in my life. After loosing my virginity, nothing will be the same. Then there'll be a need for sex, and everything I laugh at now will seem childish... So that sucks. Add to that, the insecurity of insatisfaction (what if she didn't like it? what if it ended too soon?). And what's the whole profit of having sex? I look at it as a means of reproducing myself, that's it. Maybe that will also change when I do it.

Whatever, for now I'll keep on giggling and laughing at the simple things like, thongs, panties, bras, cupping a field by association, viagra, female viagra, non-lethal venereal diseases, and whatever embarassing fact someone might throw in the air.

So have sex, enjoy it. Just don't mention anything about it in front of me, because I'll be making really immature comments that might make you feel uncomfortable. Like you don't make people make feel uncomfortable other people when you give all those details about your "nights of passion".

RETRO BIATCH

My peeps,

I here declare my most sincere rejection to the retro movement. As if it wasn't enough that we have to struggle with our present to see if there's a good possibility to succeed in the future, there are some people that refuse to let go of their "good times" and stagnate in their "golden era". The media is contaminated with retro junkies, and it's not fun anymore. Everyone wants to go back to the 60's, 70's, 80's and/or 90's. What the hell is wrong here?!

The funny thing is that this cultural retrospective movement might be OK if people were actually doing such a retrospective of what they lived in those times, but sadly, that's not the case for most countries. Back in the 1960's my country was amidst political chaos, we just ended a 30 year dictatorship that set us back democratically to the dark ages; the civil conflicts were pretty much a day-to-day reality. Politically unstable, the Dominican Republic was not your groove fest central. Hell no! Revolutions here and there, and politicians trying to grasp power and do whatever they wanted with the country. Some good others (most) bad. Another thing was that the Dominican Republic wasn't entoxicated with pop culture at those times and it was easier to identify our culture. People spoke one language at a time, not that spanglish crap we have to put up nowadays thanks to the people that are too stupid to learn one language correctly and then go to another one. In the 70's the political atmosphere was starting to get little by little more calm, although it wasn't what it was suppossed to be according to the people that killed the dictator. Corruption in our government, if I was to pin point its start, it would be at the late 60's when Juan Bosch and the country fell victim to a coup d'état thanks to the church (and nasty rumors about communism) and the militia (who were upset because of the merit promotions). So why isn't that remembered?

In the 1980's we had "democracy"... No we didn't. We first had one of the most corrupt governments to date, and after that an old decrepit idiot running a country because he was in an ego trip. Some people took advantage of that, which are/were also idiots. That same government was in charge (12 years) of governing the country for half of the 1990s; after that, there was a little bit more of democracy, due to international prssure mostly (no investors, no money). So then we had someone that actually seemed to want to run the country. But from what it seems he wants to turn the country into a mini US... How lovely. Why not become a better DR? Why not come up with our own organic system? Now in the beginning of a new century the people voted, and they picked the stupidest, most ludicrous candidate to run the country to this day; he basically traveled the country and told every investor that he could that the country was not a good place to invest (thanks jackass); what the other 2 year government cleaned (corruption wise) was again sollied by him and his cronies. So now the guy that was elected in the late 1990s is back again, hopefully things will be looking up, since the last government destroyed the economy with unnecessary loans ("hey, who wants a new helicopter?!!") and unsavory delegates.

So why not remember that we're babies when it comes to democracy? Why not rejoice in what made the country what it was in the last half of the last century? Why try to lie to ourselves doing retro parties that are not really retro? Maybe the country has low self steem... And that might be a reality we all have to recognize.

11 dias

Ya hacen 11 días de mi última entrada.
11 días que pasaron igual que otros antes que ellos,
igual que otros que vendrán.

No son tantos, pero si uno se lleva de eso termina postergando.
Postergar no es bueno, la vida humana es corta,
es mejor hacer las cosas cuando se puede.

Si se puede, uno debe hacer algo que lo entretenga.
Quede claro que cuando se puede es que no cause daño considerable.

Considerar es apreciar que el projimo esta vivo.
Aunque realmente, eso es una de las cosas que uno no puede exagerar.
Cualquier vivo te toma por pendejo, por ser demasiado considerado.

Mind Games and the Psychotic Siblings

Does anyone relate to the following:
In a family of three or more children there's a good chance that their might be one that's a bit off. It doesn't matter if him/her is the middle, eldest or youngest child, their will be one of those children that's going to have some weird personality trait that will make him/her worthy of the psycho-kid / weird-little girl/boy / black lamb label. From my experience as a middle child (third of four) and from stories I've heard from friends, co-workers and total strangers I've come up with a list of different personalities or personal tags that might be found in those little "angels" that bring us headaches and social embarassment:

1. The Ego-centric: typical to a weird kid is the need for attention, so much so that they will go to all types of things, regardless of their age, to get the attention of the people that surround them. This is the key behavior in the problem child, that desire to get your attention. They don't care if they steal their siblings thunder, and they don't really care of the consequences, as long as they get those 15 minutes they're good for the day. They stop at nothing, with utter disregard for their close ones social/work/love life; they demand attention and they want it now. If someone should desire to get back at them, the silent treatment always work (whether they're adults or not). In today's society we know these folks as dramatic royalty.

2. The Oedipus: here's the kid that cannot take themselves away from their opposite sex parental figure. They're extremely jealous and won't let their other siblings interfere in the special "bond" they've made with that figure. These are usually your daddy's girl, which eventually turns out to be slutty, or your mamas boy who turns out to be a codependent crybaby.

3. The brat: this one is a personal favorite, because at one time I was in danger of becoming one. The brat gets created when there is too much favoritism and lies between the parents and one particular child. They get accustomed to getting everything they set their eyes at, so it makes for a cocky adult, who thinks he/she can get away with everything since they don't really know what losing is like. People love making the brat lose at competitive games, and then humiliate them; I personally love just humiliating a brat at social events where it is too obvious for them to deny what happened, and their egos get a cruel beating from reality. Why am I so good at that? Remember "know thy enemy".

4. The Egoist: This one resembles the brat, but should not be confused with him/her. The brat gets what he wants whether it is physical or abstract, or else he/she throws a fit. The egoist wants everything for him/herself and will not share it with anyone, and if he/she likes something you have, he/she will take it from you and claim it as his/her own. The egoist is a real dick/bitch, as they will sometimes present themselves as normal children until they see something they want and won't share. You know the type, when during lunch break that little idiot didn't share M&M's, but had the never to ask for your homework (and God forbid you would deny him/her of that).

So there you have it, a compilation of the black lambs I managed to gather from personal experience. If you can relate to any of these personalities I suggest you get some help, if you feel like they resemble a close member of your family, a friend or foe, procede with extreme caution and remember to be the bigger person. If dealing with a child remember to be patient and condescending, they really hate it when they look stupid.

Lost and Outspoken

After the completion of my first week since returning from my training abroad I've experienced a couple of things that are worth posting here. And without further delays here they are:

1. I've gotten sick of some people that expect me to do stuff for them while they don't do the same for me; so much that some of the things I've said to them this week were brutally honest, and I know now that they might not want to speak to me. I could really care less, how should I be speaking to people that felt bad because I got a good job?
2. While in the U. S. I stopped at a Wal-Mart and picked up a 1 liter water bottle because I needed something like that for working out. On tuesday night I returned from the gym and left this water bottle on top of my kitchen counter. On wednesday after returning from work I decided to head to the gym; while looking for my water bottle I noticed that it wasn't where I left it, nobody saw anything. Saturday I spoke with the cleaning lady and she told me that it was there on wednesday when she left (she usually leaves around 5pm); which is good because that confirmed that I brought it home. Long story short, this experience has made me feel like I can't have my own stuff around my house because if I do, and someone likes it, it will suddenly dissappear and I won't see it again. And you know what? Apparently I deserve it for working my ass off and getting stuff I like. The worst part of this is the bit of hope that I have of finding it at home, which is driving me freaking bonkers.
3. After noticing my outspokeness I've apologized to some people that hugely (strangely) misinterpreted some of my comments. The apology stops there though, as it may happen that they could expect explanations for my behaviour at the moment, when there's no need for me to share that with them, or anyone else, because it is clearly no one elses business.

That's pretty much it, so much for my return experience.

Down that path

Most people like gossip, it's basically fun (embarassing) facts about people you know of. I used to find it amusing, a couple of years back in college, not anymore. What changed my mind? Gossip is basically a rumor that gets incredibly exagerated with every person that tells it, there is a great disregard for the people who're being gossiped about and most importantly, when you start gossip about other people it just means that you're basically jealous of them or they're not giving you the attention you want. People that enjoy gossip are, well, they're pretty damn bored with life. I'm taking the freedom here of generalizing because it is true. There lives are hollow and they look to fill that emptiness with other peoples misery. It's pathetic. Recently I was offered to start joining a e-group that basically does that, and to be honest: "Once bitten, two times shy". It's not funny when you get to know who you're talking about and what really happenned. I just want people to consider this when they hear a rumor about someone that is basically the product of petty jealousy.

Espejito, espejito

Ya regrese.

Muy bueno estar de vuelta en mi país. Ya empeze a trabajar el lunes. El ambiente de trabajo es diferente, uno solo se puede acordar de las clases de administracion en las lecciones que te enseñaban como administrar a culturas diferentes. Cuando uno esta fuera es bueno ponerse a observar un buen tiempo como tus homologos actuan y adaptarse a la cultura. Yo no soy del tipo de gente que se olvida de donde viene, pero tampoco yo tengo que convertir una cultura diferente en la mía. Así mismo no quiero que mi cultura se transforme en una ajena, aunque por ubicación geográfica la República Dominicana esta fuertemente influenciada por todos los países, y como nosotros no tenemos que ver con procedencia (aunque sea la gente que yo conozco) tomamos lo que queremos; muy a la romana.

La experiencia de viajar es buena, te abre la mente y te da otro punto de vista sobre la vida. A mi me hizo apreciar más de donde vengo, y al mismo tiempo a quillarme un poco con la manera en que nosotros manejamos las cosas aquí. El problema más grande que yo veo aquí es la falta de respeto al consumidor y la pérdida de los valores morales que hacen del país un buen sitio para hacer una familia.

Al final, la familia es el cimiento de nuestra sociedad, y cada uno de nosotros somos el cemento de ese cimiento. De como sea nuestra sociedad depende de como nosotros nos concebimos; si creemos que nuestro esfuerzo no vale nada, no vale nada. Ahora si nos ponemos a pelear por que nuestro esfuerzo se valore, así mismo se va a valorar. Despues de todo, "quién no grita, no mama".

Palitos Chinos

Hoy es martes, ayer fui a comer a un restauran japones llamado Takumi, muy interesante. No comi sushi, comi habashi (creo que ese es el nombre); el "habashi" se cocina, y la mayoria de las recetas del restaurante tenian carne roja. Lo interesante de este restaurante, y de esa parte del restaurante, es que el cocinero hace tambien de anfitrion y entretenimiento, comienza a hacer trucos con la comida y a tirarte cubitos de pepino para que te caiga en la boca, a mí por ejemplo me tiro 4 cubitos de los cuales el ultimo fue el que entro en mi boca. Como es japones el restaurante, los palitos de bambu estaban ahi; pase trabajo tratando de manejar los palitos, raro, por que como yo como TANTO con palitos deberia estar ya como los tigueres de las peliculas cazando moscas (aunque eso es medio asqueroso).

Ya pasando a otro tema, es lamentable el hecho que no ligue nada en este viaje. Aunque para mi sorpresa he llamado la atencion de par de mujeres que para rematar estaban buenas. He pariguayado en este viaje? NO, yo me la busque, una estaba casada asi que esa la descalifique de una vez y lo buena que estaba la desgraciada, la otra no me ha mandado ni un misero e-mail despues que salimos... Que vaina! El departamento de relaciones publicas esta bien, pero el de operaciones parece que esta deficiente. Pero, mejor es saber que diantre es que le esta pasando a uno que estar en una constante negación.

Ahora estoy en preparadera de maletas, y coordinando como me voy a hacer para regresar. Me preocupa el periodo de adaptación, la oficina de aquí comparada con la de Santo Domingo es bastante diferente; aunque si voy a estar trabajando con mi grupo en un area aislada no debería de haber ningun problema. Por otro lado lo de la coordinación de mi transporte me preocupa también, me imagino que va a ser todo un proceso como en mi ultimo trabajo (ojala que menos dramatico por que estoy demasiado viejo para ver ese tipo de presentaciones fuera de escenario).

Pero ni modo, se vive y se aprende.

Survivalism at the perfume aisle

Saturday, I went to Macy's to get some gifts I plan to give when I return. After promptly acquiring what my mother subtly suggested as her gift (I missed her birthday because of this trip), a nice perfume, I started to look for my work mate at the store. That day I wasn't feeling very good, in fact I was kind of paranoid over nothing. I don't know if anyone of you have visited a department store that has a team of viscious sales women in a certain section of the perfume aisle, but if you have you probably have had this experience: while hastely looking for my co-worker (he had the car keys and even though he wouldn't leave without me, I can't take chances) I made the little mistake of walking through that aisle, and as if I was a zebra strolling through a pack of lions I was "attacked". I want to say that because of my mood I actually reacted in a way that I shouldn't have, but it's bothersome to try to walk through a 10 feet aisle and be offered a whiff of a random essence. I know they didn't mean wrong, they were really decent considering the idea of other kind of sales people that just spray the thing all over you. It's really funny, and I'm laughing my ass off, since the first thing to come to mind when they asked "Cologne" was "no. Mace?". But hell I got what I wanted, so much for my last weekend for this trip.

Today I visited Boston, I rode the subway train "T"; it was clean, and at the same time old. I walked around the aquarium of New Englands surroundings, and it was nice. Afterwards I dined at "Legal Seafood", a restaurant facing the marina. Good food there, but the prices were not very forgiving. Service was nice, at least the kid who waited my table was being decent. Of course when compared with the crappy service of Texas BBQ from Washington Heights (Manhattan, NYC), saying "please" and "thank you" feel like the royal treatment.

So that's the story for this weekend, right now I have to start setting up my baggage layout and the schedule for the next two weeks; this experience has been fun, but I know I haven't taking advantage completely of it, in terms of how much fun I can have.

The thin one

I was walking around last weekend in one of those big department stores that you find scattered throughout malls accross the U. S., while visiting the audio section I couldn't help to eaves drop on a conversation between a man and his son. They were talking about an ipod, the same item we hear mentioned over and over again. The leading mp3 player in the market. Here's what I remember from that:
- Don't you have one of those at home.
- Yeah! But I want the thin one dad!
- But aren't they the same thing?
- Yeah! But everybody has this one!!

After listening to this most interesting conversation I deduced that the little kid got away with his plan and made his father buy him the slim ipod, the thin one. I was a bit surprised, not much though. I remember my childhood, and the way I looked at things. If I wanted something, I wanted it because it appealed to me. Nobody had to have it, I just wanted it. Although I didn't get it most of the time. Which I think affected my grades, since I thought that with good grades my parents could buy me the world. I don't think that it is a generational or cultural thing. The "I want what they have" attitude is something that comes with your personality. I'm not very fond of people like that. What happens when they're alone? How do they know what they want? Do they not eat or do anything that has to do with choices? What is worse is the fact that these people think that they shouldn't change at all. And what happens when they like something that nobody else does? Do they sacrifice their preference for social acceptance? The more I think about this, the more I feel like I'm describing someone with a bipolar disorder or at least a possible cause of that. Is this right?

On the other hand, I stand. I always liked to follow my own wishes. If people wanted me to fight, I didn't, I would rather do what I wanted. The few times I fell victim to peer pressure it felt like the biggest shame. I knew that if I did what I wanted I would have gotten what I wanted.

That's basically what I understand now. And it's funny how I knew something that some people take so much time to learn. When you go through your teenage years, I don't know yet if it's because of the hormones, external influence, or whatever the reason is, you lose confidence. Not necessarily permanently, but there is a loss; because we start to understand the losses that we can suffer when we do the things we used to do freely as children. We get "social awareness", at least most of us. When I talk about social awareness I address the fear of doing something that others might not like.

At the end, I think that not caring about what people say in most situations is healthy. The most sweetest victories are the surprising ones. The truth is that nobody should sacrifice their prerogative easily. In the old days people didn't know the power of their choice, right now we still don't know what we are able to do, undo or redo. So ask yourself this: Do I want to cut off my happiness and make others happy? or do I want to do what I want and not expect anything in return?

Reality TV, is it worth your time?

It's kind of nice, it's kind of boring; you admit you like it, but you can't help but feel a bit of guilt admitting it. Am I catching up with the reality tv trend? It is sad, but it is true. At first I started with one, then another and before I knew it, I saw myself glued to the Apprentice. I haven't gone to the point of watching survivor, and God forbid, but I really wanted to stop now. I confess that there are some commonalities between some of the contestants and I, which is why I find them so interesting. I'm not surprised, I like it when I see something familiar, at the same time I like it when something is different. It's a delicately complicated balance, difficult to explain but the reason why I don't watch most movies or shows because their "stupid" or "boring", and by "stupid" I mean that they don't make any sense to me because I don't identify with them, and by "boring" I mean that they don't offer anything new.

I like stand up comedy, I'd like to one day perform stand-up and/or improv; I like cartoons, because I like visual arts and animation, specially the really rare ones; and I like teamwork and the idea of having a successful business, which is something new to me since I've never worked in teams successfully. So that's what you can sell to me as an expectator or even as a hopeful contestant.

So is it worth my time? Reality TV is a "new" product (not so new because the first reality tv show was mtv's real world back in the early nineties) and producers are trying to sell them so desperately that it might be worth my time. But after looking at everything through my perspective, I would say that it has been worth it. It was denial, but now is catharsis. Now I have to figure out what to write about next.

Summarizin'

With less than two weeks left until my return, I have a few things to look forward to; going to the gym regularly is one of them. I have gained a lot of fat in the last few weeks, due to the increment in eating. At the same time I've slowed down my excersize, last week for instance, I didn't work out at all. My flexibility must be really low and my resistance must be on the floor. I hope that when I return I commit once more to an exercise regimen and a healthy lifestyle changing diet; I'm not going to achieve my goals if I don't change the way I eat. There's a lot of loose ends I need to tie once I return, and with my birthday rearing its head it would be great to have all those things resolved so I can have a nice get together with my close ones at a nice location. I'd love to go to a theme park and scream the day away in roller costers, but that would take a lot of money and coordination. I can't expect all of my friends to join me, although some I'd prefer to stay, since meaning well is not the same thing as wanting to be there. I hang out with all sorts of people, so some of them don't like rushes, that doesn't mean I stop liking them, just that I won't stand their whining about not doing something when I'm doing it, AND I won't even mention how irritated I get when someone tries to convince not to do something because they don't want to. But hey, that's me, and that is what I have to live with for choosing to make friends with people that have different backgrounds.

March 17 2005

This post is originally from the date of the title, just that I couldn't post it then for some weird reason that doesn't matter.

So today marks my last day in the Milwaukee training experience; and if I could describe the whole process in one word I would call it: Exhausting. Trying to cram such a vast amount of information in such little time is possible, but the retainability factor is very low. Although the training basically consist on how to look stuff up in catalogs, I don't think I'll remember everything that I was taught. I got an 80 out of 100 in the final exam, which is not what I was aiming for; but when you got the time on your back and with my perfectionist personality (which paid off, since what I answered without guessing was absolutely right), 80 seems like a 100. To be honest I didn't study, and why would I? The whole thing was about looking stuff up, it's like using a dictionary; only if I needed to memorize everything, and that's just plain stupid, I would've studied. I met some people, which I think I won't see any time soon, or again. My first experience mingling with distributors (the other people taking the crash course) was ok; they're all, in a way, alike. They're sales people, so they travel most of the year, most are avid drinkers, and I noticed that getting wasted while in a strange location came easily to them. I can't do that, getting drunk has no sort of positive retribution for me and it messes up my vocal chords (hey I don't know if I'm a good singer yet).

So that's my experience from Milwaukee, the brewery tour I was in after the whole class was pretty interesting, I learned how to gamble. HIT ME !!!

Cheese and beer

So now, I'm in Milwaukee and I leave on friday. I don't get to do a lot of sight seeing, since the training session is pretty intense and occupies all of my time. But I can't complain, I get my own room and I'm meeting new people which I will probably never talk to after this week.

Other than that it's been pretty fun. Although I'm afraid I might fall asleep due to the lack of sleep (I'm going to sleep after 12am and waking up at 5:45ish), and most presentations aren't that useful to me.

So much for this post, I don't like the cheese here, and the beer isn't what I thought it would be. So much for the beer and cheese state.

Saturday Night Hair

Today, saturday, I pretty much didn't do much. I'll tell you this, today was yet another bad hair day; and I have to confess how my bad hair days start: first there's the washing, when everything seems to be OK no problems what so ever and ready to either towel dry, gel, and even on those very vain days I might be able to blow dry my hair (not such a good idea). So then, after I wash my hair I comb it to get an idea what I can look like today; I start with something totally different and that might pass off as hip, but then I get (ironically) bored or it looks too stupid so I decide to go with my usual hair do, which depends on my hair length.

After I've gone through that whole process I towel dry my hair and basically just f**k up everything that I did. Why? Because I have to do it again but with semi dry hair; this results in complete dissatisfaction since it's physically impossible to set up my hair wet, semi dry or completely dry. After I realize I can't do anything the hair is way too dry, so I let it go. But this is only one instance, worse cases come when I let my hair dry with the breeze, which results in the volumization of my hair. By the end of the day it looks like an aspiring afro.

This is officially the most shallow post I've made so far here, maybe the first of many. But who cares, if you haven't lost interest at this point you probably saw something familiar, because everyone has bad hair days, I just have a bad hair life.

Hey but not all is bad hair days, with this message there's a photo of me from my visit to MIT.



Look, look, it's the MIT CoOp. To be honest, it's not fun to go by myself. I miss my friends, but I love the whole experience. I'm grateful!

Hooters and Sushi

Long time since I posted; very long time, blog wise. So here's what I've done:

1. Went to hooters, saw mildly cute chicks in short shorts and tank tops; and your blue collar types. The food wasn't that great, but the ladies made the effort to keep everyone happy so you gotta give them credit for that.
2. Last weekend went to a tropical dance club/school, now I can say that I danced salsa in Cambridge. I got lost in the way, but hell I had fun and it was worth it.
3. Went to New York City the next day or was it the same day; it was fun, I ate lunch at a Chinese/Dominican restaurant. General Tso chicken and yellow plantains are a good combination.
4. That night I went for dinner at a restaurant called Texas BBQ with my cousin and his wife, that restaurant was a total nightmare, the service was RUDE, they got me the wrong drink, my steak wasn't cut correctly and to just ruin the whole evening to its maximum extent they were practically kicking us out of the restaurant.... I really didn't get that stupid move, if you don't want to serve anyone, close your bloody kitchen like the rest of the decent places. I encourage people not to visit any of their locations.
5. That sunday I visited NYC by myself, I like to call that scouting (which I think is the term I'm suppossed to use). It's really fun, and in my experience (I've gone out with whiny, hard headed people, and that has affected my travel preferences) it's the best way to do it. The city is not that dangerous if you're smart enough. I had lunch at a little sushi restaurant at the Tribeca area called Shinjuku 2, it was really fun I kept taking pictures of everything and the staff there (3 people) were probably making fun of that, but hell who gives a fuck! I'm still waiting for those pics though.





6. Later on I went to Madame Tussauds museum and saw all the statuettes, which sometimes were pretty accurate, other times they didn't resemble the celebrity they attempted to.

So there you have it, fun weekend (despite that stupid restaurant). I miss my friends and family back home; but I don't regret being here. So far so good!

The cluttered cupboard

The people that chat with me through MS mess may have noticed that I often use my nick quoting some "cluttered cupboard" title. Truth being told, there is no book named the "Jorge and the Cluttered Cupboard". In fact, there might be a chance that I start writing about some of the things that happen to me in real life, and with the aid of fiction (lots of it) I could make it a readable compedium of some of my experiences. In a way the cluttered cupboard represents that amazing amount of ideas that I have, the ones that just keep popping into my head, the ones that make me write for about 2 straight hours in front of my computer just to erase a whole file of 20 pages of pure creativeness, just because I got derailed from the main objective.

So my head is the cluttered cupboard, at least sometimes.... I manage to find it in me to grab a ladder and climb up to the cupboard and start organizing things. At the end of the day it is satisfying looking at it and realizing that everything for this few minutes is neatly organized and even noticing that there is still some space left is great.

Later on, I know I'll fill it up again; but it's my cupboard, and as long as I take the time to organize it frequently I should not find it difficult to go on with the rest of the house.

But the cupboard, that's mine.

Mango Lassi

By the way, that's the name of an Indian drink (non alcoholic). I like it, it's pretty good and I think it's best to drink it either from 10am to 11:30am as a pre lunch shake or from 4pm to 6pm since by that time you've used enough energy to be kinda hungry.

So how did I get to know about this drink? Easy, I visited an Indian Vegetarian Restaurant, and todays was the second time I went there. The food is very VERY spicy, and that's a warning. But enough of that, this is my blog not a culinary column, although it's tempting but my budget won't allow that kind of hobby. This weekend, according to the weather channel, there's suppossed to be some snow showers (which allegedly are really light and tourist friendly, YAH RIGHT!) so there might be a chance of me visitting a ski lodge or ski park or whatever they're called.

Well I'm gonna make this one short so that's the end of this entry, I'm not gonna make any funny stories about the prank call I made last tuesday.

See ya!

Razon de ser...

Sometimes there are times that I feel like writing of whatever goes through my head at the moment, and thanks to my parents excellent academic planning and my own I'm happy to be able to.

So this is the raison d'etre of this blog. That and the whole idea of my close ones to know what I'm up to, no matter where I am. This, in its whole, is for you my friends. I really appreciate the fact that you are interested in my well being is very flattering so I'm very grateful, therefore I started this. Read and comment, feel free to say whatever you wish, after all if I don't like it, I'll just erase it... haha! Of course, I'm not kidding.

Enjoy!