Morning List

At 8 am everything feels so fuzzy. The lights don't let you open your eyes all the way, and you really don't want to wake up or get out of bed (if the two can be done separetely). Your head feels shaken, not stirred, as you try to sit up in bed and a list of the things you have to do today comes down from the sides. The digital age has its effects on you, since everything you have to do is now visualized in your head as a window you don't want to click the "close" button of, most of the time. You think twice about getting up, then again, that would mean staying in bed for longer and delaying everything you have to do; that can't be good.

The funny thing about days, at this time of your life, is that they seem to go by faster than when you were younger. You don't remember feeling as tired as you do when you wake up, and going out now means spending your own hard-earned money, which makes you wonder how much of a mess you would be if you were the heir of some product empire. The longing for a "daddy-card" and your very own trust fund come to mind. An interesting fact: this takes place parallel to you realizing that you do have to get up and running, life doesn't wait for anyone, although you always hope it would wait for you every now and then.

Circle

Life lately, or whatever it stands for, as being a pretty mess for me. I've been returning from work and doing everything else I did the other day. The cycles are now showing up: wake up, shower, get dressed, work, eat, work, leave, return, and gym/vegetate. I have a lot of books to read and make use of, but this seems so much comfier. I always say to myself: "let me start today, but a little bit later". Procrastination rears its ugly head every weekday at 7pm.

The solitaire game on my pc looks mighty inviting. I wind up loosing 30 percent of the time, but I always try again and again, until I realize it's 12am and I'm only getting 7 hours of sleep; some people claim to do fine with 6 hours of sleep, maybe less. I need 8 hours, and that's it. I don't need naps or power naps for that matter, as long as I wake up feeling refreshed the next day.

A persons life can take that boring path. I wonder what I can do to avoid lingering in this state, and if I decide to let it take more time. I am not getting any younger.